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I’m new here baseball son question

Mamaoffour profile image
13 Replies

mom of four here my son 7 now has ADHD & ODD he’s in baseball and today I gave him his medication when I picked him up we went to practice and I was waiting for it to kick it but I never noticed anything it was a rough day he was throwing his hat throwing his glove up in the air (during his down time or when he’s in line waiting for a drill) threw his helmet in the dug out and sliding when it wasn’t needed he did manage to stay focused during the drills and actual practice since he was captain he was really engaged …. anyways the coach said a few words at the end like kids need to keep their eyes on him when he’s talking which my son does most the time but there are times he gets easily distracted like oh look at the clouds and sun most days. When we got back my son told me he actually didn’t take his medication and he spit it out so he was out there fully himself in my eyes he did the best for not being medicated but I know his new coaches don’t know that part of him since he is usually on his medication anyways my point is I have not told this coach or any of his coaches of his ADHD medication should I let them know of his diagnosis or how do you go about it I also don’t want my son to receive any special treatment or be looked at differently

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Mamaoffour profile image
Mamaoffour
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13 Replies
LisethHIS profile image
LisethHIS

Hi, Mamaoffour,

Thank you for contacting CHADD National Resource Center on ADHD. I commend your son for his honesty in disclosing that he spat out the medication. It's important to explore alternative options, especially if he has reservations about oral medication. I recommend consulting his medical provider regarding the potential suitability of a transdermal patch, which could offer a viable solution.

I understand your concern. In situations like these, it's important to ensure that those around your son have a comprehensive understanding of his needs. Perhaps consider arranging a meeting with his coach to openly discuss his ADHD. Frosting a supportive community that truly comprehends your son and are able to create an environment where he can thrive. It's worth noting, however, that the decision to disclose his ADHD is deeply personal and should align with your comfort level. What matters most is ensuring your son feels supported and understood. Here is a link for you to check out when you get a chance wrightslaw.com/blog/special... and chadd.org/adhd-news/adhd-ne...

If there is anything else you need, please let me know.

Best Regards,

Liseth

Health Information Specialist

CHADD’s National Resource Center on ADHD

chadd.org

Trying1978 profile image
Trying1978

Rarely on here this days but baseball caught my eye. So we eventually gave up baseball with our son (almost 9) and switched to basketball on the advice of his psychiatrist because, as she said, there's no downtime in basketball. There's so much stimulation that they stay focused or hyper focused the whole time. It was a little sad, because I liked him playing baseball; I coached him a lot of the time, and he was pretty good, to boot, but he just could not deal with being in the outfield or waiting to bat. He's been much happier with a combination of basketball (!), and now we have our youngest doing m t-ball now and I'm coaching her and she's doing okay. But when you move up to the higher levels and the other kiddos take it more seriously, I think it's really hard for ADHD kiddos to maintain the same level of focus. My son was competitive but he lacked the focus to be as competitive as a non ADHD kids on the team. So he would always be getting into trouble on the bench waiting to bed or doing wild things in the outfield and it got to the point when it was his first season of kid pitch or last season of coach pitch (I can't remember) that I was literally having to go on to the field during almost every play and I thought that this really isn't a fair for the the coaches and the other kids so we talked to his doctor and his doctor was like just drop it and try basketball and it worked pretty well. Hope that makes sense. As I said I'm not on here much these days but the baseball thing caught my eye because that that was a big struggle last year and I had to do a lot of thinking about it and talking about it with my own therapist and I realized that it was as much about me as it was about him. That is it wasn't that big of a deal for him to drop a sport and pick up another one it was more than a big deal for me. Anyway hope that helps, voice texting here so excuse the ramble.

BTW I used to share the diagnosis but only when it seemed necessary. If the people you are telling only have the media stereotype version of ADHD in their heads, what's the point? I will tell the folks at a school related team or a week long camp, but other than that, I don't with either of our ADHD kiddos (10 yo daughter too).

Mamaoffour profile image
Mamaoffour in reply to Trying1978

Thank you this was helpful so my son was on a 6u team he just turned 7 but he really enjoys baseball but he is very passionate with dodge ball soccer and any type of sport and he’s really good he made 10 or more home runs this season but he does get worried about score are they winning he’s also a great defense player but without medication or long games I do feel like on his time off base or not batting can be bad he will be throwing glove and maybe about three boys will be goofing around as he is getting older though he has gotten better at it so I’m hoping he will have some good day and some not so good day but yes I don’t think I’m going to let them know diagnosis he already seems like he judges and it’s too late to back out now for the summer season plus he is very passionate distracted sometimes but he is in the game for most part. He also gets along with all his teammates. I think we might do soccer next they have been talking about that for the longest .

Trying1978 profile image
Trying1978 in reply to Mamaoffour

No worries. I used to tell all the coaches but then I saw that they actually let him get away with more "bad" behavior once they knew! So now, I only do if he does something really out there just as an FYI.

Your son's behavior sounds pretty on the nose for that age group overall, though (to me, anyway), so I'm sure he's fine to keep going. We were in wacky land in the fall!

Baseball this past Fall, the one game we did, was a nightmare. Not only was he non-stop playing in the dirt like our 4-year-old in tee ball, he was climbing the back-stop fence while waiting to bat, stealing stuff from the coach's bag, and just wilin out with the other kiddos. The difference, as his doctor explained, was that if those kiddos didn't have ADHD, they could probably be wild for a few minutes, then focus and go bat whereas my son would think it was funny to bat with the bat the wrong way around, much like some of the kiddos on our youngest's tee ball team!

With basketball (for us, anyway, not saying this is true for anyone else), he's just so amped up and into it and overstimulated and tired that he rarely acts out. I miss baseball so much, so I started coaching our youngest in tee ball last year and she's doing it again this spring so I figure we shall see!

I've coached all three of my kiddos in baseball and basketball and it does seem like the ADHD has definite effects. My oldest had the opposite reaction with basketball; I almost pulled her from a summer league last summer because she was just being so weird and spacey on the court, but so much depends on time of day and meds, I think. Also, the conventional wisdom is BE INVOLVED, but I'm hanging up my coaching duties after the youngest is done with tee ball because I think they act out far less when I'm less visible. Anyway, more information than you needed!

anirush profile image
anirush

My grandson could not do baseball. Too much standing around time. He ended up in Taekwondo and did really well in that although he would still get distracted at times.

Redpanda5 profile image
Redpanda5

Hello Mamoffour,

I am also rarely on here now that my kids are college age but the baseball also caught my eye.

My son played D1 soccer in college. He started in baseball in early elementary school too and he wasn’t medicated and was bored.

Funny story. — He was playing at a multiplex in the outfield one Saturday morning as other sports were going on around us. I looked up at one point and he had left the outfield and had joined the soccer game behind it! 🤣

I would not bother telling coaches of his adhd. They would very likely treat him differently and if they don’t understand adhd it could be detrimental to your son. We chose not to tell and it was the right decision for us.

On the advice of his psychiatrist, my son didn’t take his medication before soccer practice or games all the way through college. It took away his quick thinking and since he loved soccer he had hyperfocus. I suggest finding a sport your son is interested in so he can tap in to his hyperfocus.

I got a good chuckle at your son’s coach saying that he needs 7 YEAR OLD boys to look at his eyes when he speaks. He’s expecting quite a bit for that age group! I personally would move on. I’ve known these types of coaches.

You are wise in collecting information from all angles so that you can make the best decision for your son.

Best of luck!

Mamaoffour profile image
Mamaoffour in reply to Redpanda5

That is so funny something my son would do he loves soccer too my son actually would be outfielder and he would end up in the in field running in trying to tag the players he would also chase the players that would run in circle and be out I would be like why is this still going on they would be like it’s cute let him get tired I would let him.

Yes I’m not a big fan of this coach he is new to us but I don’t like how he expects the kids to look at his eyes these boys are 5-7 but it’s a little to late we are committed to the team but if during games is bad I will pull him and take it as a loss but I don’t think my son would want to he is very passionate

Redpanda5 profile image
Redpanda5 in reply to Mamaoffour

That is so funny! 🤣 He’s clearly trying to make it more interesting! I can’t say that I blame him!

If it were me, I would start looking to exit left stage. I don’t see it as worth it to be subjecting you and your son to someone who belittles you both. That’s gold that you already know he likes soccer. He’s young, you know you can even switch mid season —- he’s young. Are there ANY pros to staying? Does he have friends on the team? We changed soccer teams during the middle of the season when our son was 12! I encourage you to consider drawing a line in the sand and move on — at the very least, at the end of the season. Life is too short to torture both you and him when he has other untapped interests that may be a better fit.

Consider his perspective. I would ask him if he would rather continue playing baseball or try soccer instead or another sport he may mention that involves a lot of movement. Also, there are excellent coaches out there —- you just have to put some work into finding them.

My wish is for both of you to have a positive experience with sports. Best to you!

CHADDMOM profile image
CHADDMOM

I think the philosophy about taking medicine is different for everyone. I see it as a way to do what I know. It should be taken at the same time everyday, regardless of day or events. The point of it is to provide focus and better consistency in our daily routine.

If he is feeling like he cannot connect to what he is doing, he might need an adjustment in dosage. Kids can have several dosage/medication switches before they find a medication that fit seamless and is comfortable.

Mamaoffour profile image
Mamaoffour

thank you everyone all these comments were so helpful…. so this was his second day in his afternoon dose he didn't like the taste so I have to give him something after like juice I am not telling coach his diagnosis you’re right I would get him out if I knew this was coach he also is very passionate about this sport he has made a lot of home runs and great defense as well this past season he is usually worried about hitting he gets nervous up batting but when he hits those are some power hits he usually enjoys every sport he wants to try soccer next but we gotta get through summer he also just has a hard time only on his down time when we have long baseball days but when it comes to batting or outfield he is alert and trying his best . Thank you guys again

KC71 profile image
KC71

Hi Mamaoffour,

My oldest was diagnosed with ADHD/ODD at the age of six. I completely understand your struggles as I have lived through them. I am so glad to hear you have your son involved in working to help your n a structured and safe environment. I dis not share with my son's coaches of his diagnoses. Looking back on this decision, I feel it was a mistake. His teachers were well aware and were supportive and helpful when his behavior was less than stellar. I too was probably concerned that the coaches would treat him differently or not play him at all. However, teachers and coaches that work with children everyday (I can say as both a teacher and coach) easily recognize the behaviors that are associated with our children's challenges. If the coach is aware that you, as a parent, are working to help your child through medication and learning strategies to help deal with difficulties, he will likely hop on board and join in as an avid supporter for your child. After years of trying everything to help my son succeed, I am certain that knowledge is the best super power. He is a collegiate athlete and double majoring in Criminal justice/psychology as a junior now. You will get there Mama!

Hugs,

KC71

Mamaoffour profile image
Mamaoffour in reply to KC71

That is so good to hear and so much hope in this comment thank you I see his potential even at school he zooms through his work gets it correct and then he is so bored

Klmamma profile image
Klmamma

I'd tell them, we always do. Often we have found the coaches son has it too no matter what sport we're in. My husband coaches football and things go much much better when the parents are honest with him about the kids challenges. It's not so he can have special treatment, it's so they know when they have to get his eye contact 100 times in one sentence that he's not doing it to be disrespectful. It also helps bc my son will need to look at the play board before he goes out for every football play and the coach would probably have thought he was crazy if I hadn't told them lol.

I'd try something more active. Basketball, soccer, etc. I would not recommend TKD. My son couldn't handle baseball until age 9. He just started wrestling and so far that's his absolute favorite one. He's 10 now.

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