I know it’s unrealistic for me to think that my partner will be able to fully understand my endometriosis and the procedure that I recently had to remove the scar tissue, etc.
I had my surgery back home in a different state away from my partner. Unfortunately due to his work and lack of flexibility he could not fly down with me. The day before my surgery he went out with his coworkers and got drunk and called me at midnight to talk… I was a bit annoyed but I told myself that I can’t expect his life to stop just because mine is currently limited however I couldn’t help but to feel a bit disappointed. I move forward had the procedure and a few days after recovering we were FaceTime in and he became frustrated and mad at me because he thought I had an attitude with him. I had to then explain to him that I was in a lot of pain and I thought it was a bit insensitive of him due to my circumstances for starting this fight. He then apologized and said that he had completely forgot that I had the surgery. Now that completely blew my mind and really made me feel alone. A week later I was able to fly home and be reunited with him. Within a day I was asking him for help with some thing and he was making it such a big deal… later on that night I expressed to him how I was feeling. That I understand he has never had surgery before nor endometriosis and because it had only been seven days I didn’t think it necessary to remind him that I was still in pain but I told him that I am in pain and I really need him to not be so combative when I ask him for help that I’m really just trying to get through this. He was receptive and you can tell he felt bad so I moved forward. A day later he help me with a few things around the house and everything was going fine I wasn’t feeling well so I went to lay down and he went to go hang with a friend. He came back a bit intoxicated I wasn’t surprised. Later that night I was feeling really bad I was vomiting and I tried to wake him. he wouldn’t wake up then he told me to leave him alone so I went into the restroom and I slept there. He found me this morning in the restroom and was completely surprised I was a bit annoyed and got up and just went straight to the bed later on I called him and communicated that how I was feeling and that I was feeling alone in this process but for some reason he could not receive how I was feeling and took it as a direct complaint upon him and that somehow he is at fault for my pain. I tried to explain that what I’m looking for is empathy and support… I just wanted to ask the board has anyone gone through similar things is it just my spouse or has anyone else dealt with this?
